Monday, June 28, 2010

So is it ok to

1. Say "i luv you " to your boyfriend of 6 months (if you actually luv him) but he has never said the words to you and you aint sure if he does.

2. Ask how your boyfriend of 6 months, if he is luv with you or how he feels about you generally

Apart from saying if its ok, i'd like to know if its something you can do too....


P.S. am not in luv with anybody, i dont even have a boyfriend yet, am still hanging out with Nd but no commitments yet cuz his lifestyle is arghhhh....but am having fun


BBB said...

i think its okay
better to know where u stand
and u can tell him u love him
6months is long enough to love sumone

it feels great to love and be loved in return

and if he doesnt love u, u know not to go deeper in love so u can protect ur heart :)
how r u hun

CerebrallyBusy said...

well i don't know as i would tell my boyfriend i love him when im not sure if he feels the same best friend recently did that and i know what she's going through and it's not pretty.

but i guess it's ok to ask him how he feels about you

oluSimeon said...

1 .No

2. Yes, if its to define the way forward..

er.. sorry ..are guys allowed to answer.././?

Parakeet said...

The moment you feel something in your relationship and dont express it then you have resorted to playing games. This happened to me precisely. BF didn't tell me he loved me until like 100times after I've told him. I told him 4 months into the relationship and he didn't tell me until the 7th month. I didn't regret it but I did feel embarrassed the times I told him and the gesture was never returned. Pple get to this level at different times and if you get there first I dont see why you cant say it.

If you tell your BF you love him before he does and you subsequently have problems, I dont believe it's down to your confession. And if it was truly down to your confession then you don't need such an immature person in your life anyway.

isha said...

I don't see a problem at all. In my opinion, it doesn't matter who says 'i love you' first. In fact, some people may never be able to actually 'say it'. While it poses a problem for many people, it just helps to understand that people are different. A guy may be saying 'i love you' but not meaning it, while another is not saying it, but showing his love in ways that definitely leave you without a doubt...

I would tell my boyfriend I loved him, if I felt it was the right time. Doesn't matter if he doesn't say it back immediately.

Naijalines said...

Tricky one. I'd prolly wait to see that I'm sure of what he feels first. But that's just me.

If you are thinking long term with the guy, then it's definitely right to ask those questions after six months or less sef. It's more about how it's done. If it's kinda diplomatic, in a playful kinda way, you can ask about anything at anytime.

Lara said...

1. No
2. Yes

he might not feel the say way if you tell him first, things btn ou guys would now be awkward.but if you realy want to, you can go ahead, he might be different

neefemi said...


2cute4u said...

Hmmm, never! Don't ever,, the best you can do is show it through your actions.. Never , no matter how good he is!
You can ask him and even after he tells you how he feels don't tell him how you feel just yet please.

Dee! said...

1. Hell NO!
2. There is no harm in the babe knowing where she stands in the guys life. . . so it is okay for a babe to ask her 6 months old boyfriend how he feels about her.

Fabulo-la said...

Why is everyone saying no?
I agree with Parakeet. Yes, no, yes, no, maybe it will all become mind games.

Say what you need to say jo. If you love him, and u r in a relationship, then what is holding you??

Andrea said...

No, is not ok. Let him say it first. Then again its a personal decision.

leggy said...

i think its a personal can love anybody in any amount of long as you are sure.
personally, i cant do it, which is why i said its a personal thing.i'd rather he told me that he loves me first.

Myne Whitman said...

Yes to both and it is something I can do and have done. BBB has the reasons I would give too.

TayneMent said...

Never been in the situation but I wouldn't tell a guy I loved him first. After 6 months I might ask how he feels but I would not ask if he is in love with me.

Sting said...

Saying i love you is not hard for me, if i really feel i love the person. Some guys are scared of saying it first. So if u feel it and and u want to share with him, pls feel free to.

As for asking a guy you are with how he feels about you, that is a no brainer. You should have asked this question (since u still have doubts) way before 6 months.

I don't believe in all these rules o. Do what you are comfortable with. 6 months is long enough.

miss.fab said...

1. Yes. I can't actually say that I 100% can do this though. I don't know. Theoretically (i.e in my head) it's not a big deal but realistically (for me), I don't see it happening.

2. Yes. I mean... he had to have told you how he felt about you before you two decided to go out, yes? Lol

9jaPhoenix said...

Much as I am all for going out on a limb and all, a dude who's unusually quiet about such is suspect. The length of time means nothing as compared with the emotions and feelings involved.

Anonymous said...

1. there is no harm in saying that first, provided the guy is mature and would not resort sometime to 'she threw herself at me.'

my GF used to send me those MTN 'call me, i love you,' long before we arrived at defining the relationship.

the day she realised, she was so embarrassed and asked why i never responded to that, and i beleive i replied that i felt it was done in error, that she could as well have told me to my face.

2. if you connect very well, then 6 months is long enough to have the talk.

though i have seen only a little of it, ur blog seems nice.


Enyonam said...

Hmmm... I tried doing the two in two different relationships and lets just say things didn't go well after that.

So, from personal experience; it is a risk that you must be prepared to take with the knowledge that you could end up happy or disappointed.