Wednesday, May 23, 2012

why are you not pregnant?

So it’s been almost 4 months of marriage! And of course the why are you not pregnant / are you pregnant matter is popping up already?
Last weekend one of my best friend / maid of honor got married, I happened to be sitting on the same table with my mother and we had this conversation:

Mum: How are you now how is the hubs? Why dint he come for the wedding?
Me: He is fine, mummy, he is out of town, work!
Mum: Ok, are you pregnant?
Me: What? No! why? Do I look pregnant?
Mum: No! just that it’s been almost 4 months already
Me: ah, ok, we don’t plan to have kids now, I told you na! maybe next year
Mum: I reject it for you, what do you mean?
Me: We are not ready jo, emotionally or financially, besides we are enjoying our alone time
Mum: Alone time? what does that mean? Better do this thing now, that I’m around to help you
Me: you are just 51! Mummy, where do you plan on going, that you won’t be around to help me
Mum: DO it now oooooooooooooooo! It’s too risky to wait. you can have one, then rest
Me: Mummy, leave me alone jo, dint I tell you I was going for interviews, I’m about to change jobs, who would hire me if I’m pregnant
Mum: I hear you o! but family over career. Hope you ar not taking pills? My hand is not there o!
Me: o lawd, mummy! I'm not taking pills let me go and dance in with the bride


Last month, my mother in law was returning to America, she stays 6 months there and 6 months here, at the airport, she cornered me to have this conversation:
MIL: Better do quick and come to America to give birth now that I’m still there o, so I can help you
Me: Ok ma
MIL: All that one my son is saying, next year or 2 years’ time, don’t listen to him o! as women we have our ways, just do what you need to do. Once it has entered it has entered
Me: Ok ma, safe journey



Tega said...

I couldn't help laughing...

Wish I could be of help...I'll just wish you luck...Moms will be moms


Luciano said...

lwkm............mothers enn.
before marriage, its "you better marry now, so that people wont start talking"
after marriage, " have kids now so ill see my grandkids"
after first kid, "have more now, and rest later"
you can never satisfy them

Atoskin said...

Mothers are funny sha, my mom would also do the same.

When my mom starts with me, i just listen to her ideas and suggestions, doesn't mean i always agree with her but that's practically the only way to make peace and it works!

Thanks for posting.

'Lara said...

and everyone wonders why I am stalling and refused to go back to Nigeria.

first pressure to get married then pressure to have kids. It is not easy biko... hope you are enjoying married life sha.

But this one that your own mum has also cornered you, it wont be easy oh.

bumight said...

Lol! they will always ask. and when u have one, they'll ask when ure going tohave another one....they never stop!

oh, and i need to ask u some questions. whats ur email?

Jemima said...

this made me laugh, mothers are all the same honestly! at least your mother in-law knows her son's plans and is not harrasing you just kinda suggesting!

Amaka's Notepad said...

LOL, thank God its only the mothers that are on your case. Some ppl arent that lucky - Aunties, mums friends and even distant friends all lend their voices to the 'when e go be' cry!
My friend and her hubby wanted to wait a while b4 having kids like this too until my friend got this in church from one of her church girls
Church Gal - Babe how far na, anything yet
My friend - We still dey take our time.
Church mate - una dey take una time? When ur husband stomach dey grow instead of ur own!

That was it. Her resolve broke. My friend took in th very next month!

When it comes to marriage and pregnancy, everybody dey get wetin to contribute. mtchewww

Babe, i tagged u over at my blog. Hop over there and check it out, will ya?

QMoney said...

I can tell you for free "the have one and rest" line is a Scam!!!
My mum said the same thing to me and she has been BUGGING my life since my son turned 9months.i told her i amw waiting till he's 2 and she drops lines every now and then!!
i even told her i want jus 2 kids so why the hurry and she's rejecting 2kids for me
as if she'll be the one to send them to

1 + The One said...

LOL @ the mothers-in-waiting
It's always nice to 'read' from you... xxxx

Priscy said...

mothers! they sometimes get worried over nothing really. I wish you all the best ok?

Anonymous said...

LOL! Omg already? Lord! Good luck with fending them off for a year oh lol

My Continous improvement said...

Mothers will always be mothers. Sometimes i wonder if i will end up like that. I hope to be more sensitive. Sometimes that question evokes so much pain especially for the one who has been trying to no avail.

Toinlicious said...

Hahaha Mothers o!

Writefreak said...

Hmmmph that question. I heard it too many times. After a while, people gave up on me. Lol. There's always so much pressure from parents etc and it's so sad when there are so many people who even want kids but are finding it difficult to have them.

Mikki said...

I wish my mom would have such a discussion with me...Laughter would just hurt me

Just graduated and now everyone is talking Marriage...It has not been a week since the ceremony. I have not even picked up the diploma

I stand by the wait a year after marriage... enjoy your time as wife... the moment you realize your pregnant you become Mother and that title will hold for another 18+ years!!
Best wishes!!

Anonymous said...

O lawd!!!! I remember clearly the last time I was on your blog it was about you just getting married so when I saw the title of your blog I did a double take! Are you serious!? I am so not looking forward to that! Goodluck with shielding all the comments.

LohiO said...

Really?? already???? OMG!!!!! lol at least you are being a good sport about it.

Sisi Yemmie ™ said...

Lol...typical! They expect you to be pregnant 1 hour after marriage!

Dela's Journal said...

this is funny as hell.

Anonymous said...

Burst out laughing!
No vex my sistah....couldn't help it!
You are being cornered to the wall by both MOTHERS!
Wishing you goodluck and happy married life....women!..ahahahaha


Interesting read. SO, this is the kind of pressure we're likely to face... hmmm...


~Sirius~ said...


downtheaisle said...

get used to it and develop a thick skin towards the question, dont bother urself at all...dats d truth!!! after u've had one,they will start hounding u once d baby is 9mths for the next one.

me i have had one, and i am resting and deres nothing anyone can do abt it!!!!

@ilola said...

Loool. African families and their pressures.

N.I.L (Naijamum in London) said...

The pressure never stops dearie

Even after having a baby, it will be ..'You must try for a boy/ girl next'

Even when you have both...'it will be you cant stop at this number oh'....

You can never satisfy them

Good Naija Girl said...

So funny...I can hear my mom saying the exact same thing about waiting to me. Whenever I've told her that I want to have some alone time after marriage but before kids she doesn't want to hear it.

Mind you, I don't have a husband o but just the thought that I wouldn't have a baby immediately upon marrying is upsetting to her.

"Hope you are not taking pills? My hand is not there o!" Too funny!

Blessing said...

Nah wa ooo...pele

Take your u!

Anonymous said...
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HoneyDame said...

LMMMAAAAOOOOOO....Nne, good luck o! U will need it!

Amy said...

I nearly doubled over in laughter. Your mother and mother-in-law are too much oh!

mizchif said...

I'm cracking up at that "Once it has entered, it has entered"

It doesn't ever end does it.

Hope you're loving married life so far.

Myne Whitman said...

And so it will continue, LOL...the truth is that they're doing it will good intentions :)

aloted said...

muhahaha this was too funny but i am not surprised.

leave that "do one and rest" story they will still harass u for number 2. hehe

gotta love them mums!

Okeoghene said...

This one is double barrel pressure from both sides. They mean well though.

RQ said...

hahahahaha! i swear this is hilarious. i mean really, i have to link it to my facebook for you. tooooo funny @ i hope you're not taking pills, my hand is not there o.

charity said...
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kim said...
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Ginger said...

Oh dear! Has it started already? mind them joo.

MsJB said...

LOL this story got me laughing :)