Sunday, January 8, 2012

random wierd ish

Its almost midnight. I'm lying on my bed. Listening to music from the 90s. Its making me nostalgic.

Some of the music reminds me of my ex.. Our love for rap music and jay z was one thing we had in common. Funny how I spent six years with him and I can't really remember our relationship per say. Its like that part of me never existed. I wonder at the fickleness of love. How can someone be your world today and Tomorrow irrelevant in the grand scheme if things.

In less than 4 weeks I'll be married. I remember being that little girl that stayed up the entire night digesting romance novels, wondering about prince charming and how it felt to be swept off my feet and find true love and live happily ever after. When did I grow up and how did it happen so fast? I'm tempted to go and wear my wedding dress. Its hanging in my wardrobe waiting for my big day.

I'm crying....I don't know why. I'm so emotional these days. The slightest thing makes me cry.

Earlier this evening I looked at my dad and I felt so bad for all the fights we have had over this wedding planning. Some people wish their dad was alive to see their big day and here I am stressing about him hijacking my wedding. I love my dad so much and I'm thankful to God for keeping him and my mom alive to be a part of this.

My respect for her has tripled since I became engaged. Its so hard to be a woman in this male dominated world. Harder self to he Married to a man like my dad I guess...its hard being his daughter....wonder how it is to be his wife. Childbirth...nurturing...all the sacrifices....its not easy at all. I pray God blesses her with long life to enjoy the fruit of her labor.

My friends have been amazing throughout this process. I have few friends and they have all come through for me.

This whole planning process has been a roller coaster of emotions. I guess its almost here.

I just need to survive the remaining three weeks.

I wonder how marriage would be....I pray its nowhere close to what this planning has been though.

I guess I'm about to find out

The tears are all gone....I'm actually smiling now....wierd indeed.


Madame Sting said...

Congrats chic. Happy for u. Do we get to see pictures?

'Lara said...

Please keep the smile...Pray the day goes on well. Congrats.


As you look forward, may His presence go with you and give you rest on every side.

On the topic you first raised, sincerely, I wonder at that too... its umimaginable how one would spend a whole 5-6years with someone like a "cannot do without" and then after breaking up, its like "you dont matter in my world". Well, I guess, such is life.

It is well..

Congrats, Sis.


Pretty Lashes said...

aww, I can totally understand your roller coaster of emotions, I have about 7 months to go and I'm emotional, I can only imagine how you're feeling with 3 weeks to go.

Its just a day, less than 24 hours infact. Life begins when the marriage starts.


Sugarcoated said...

Congrats honey. I'm really happy Ƒø̲я̅ you

Tega said...

Hey Doll

Totally get the emotions as per 'getting over relationships'

Less than 3 weeks...just like yesterday you said you got engaged...All the best on the new curve..May it be smooth, sweet and fruitful...x

Nutty J. said...

Remain happy girl... congratulations

aloted said...

I definitely know what you mean about forgetting what your past rel was about..that is what time heals...thank God for time!

Soon you'll be an iyawo!!!!! exciting stuff

Being a woman/single/wife/mother in a male dominated world is serious hard work! but we have God on our side..and his Joy is our strength.

You'll be fine :)

Roc said...

Too young to have a mid-life crisis, so it's gotta be pre-marital jitters?
Or maybe not..

Congrats and all the best!

miss.fab said...

Awww glad you got to smiling at the end. :)

Okeoghene said...

Congratulations * I am sounding like a broken record now, that is all i say since you announced your engagement* Happy to hear you are happy again and the tears are gone

~Sirius~ said...

I can't remember my relationship of almost 7yrs. To think I believed I would die if we didn't end up together. LoL.
I happily got married 3 yrs later.

As for marriage. It is totally awesome, however what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

dosh said...

Congratulations babe, i pray God keeps you smiling even through your marriage and not just the wedding

14me said...

congrat dear am ypur favorite i know the feeling cos it happen to me too my wedding is coming in april and the planning is getting me crazy

Myne Whitman said...

Roller-coaster indeed. Such is life. all the best dear. Keep smiling.

1 + The One said...

Awwww *big hug*..
I pray that you have the most special day and that your marriage is more beautiful than you've imagined it to be xx

PS I'm guessing there may be loads of *happy* tears on your engagement/wedding day, Daddy's girl xxxx

Ema Leecious said...

It will be a fantastic one, don't worry.

QMoney said...

I can't wait...let the countdown begin!!
congrats dear

Mbabazi said...

wishing the happiest life in the new chapter marriage and may the wedding be everything you imagined...

Geebee said...

Happy married life, doll! Trust me, it's gonna be a lot more fun than you can imagine. I bet the first few weeks should have proven that to you already. Just have God in the driving seat and it should be a smooth ride! All the best, sis!