Sunday, August 17, 2008

i cant comprehend

Ok so i have this friend i met at A level class, very beauriful girl. we went to the same uni. at least for 100 level. she was the reigning chic on campus then cuz really she is beauriful, gorgeous, all in all.

Anyways she left for America after 100 level, we kept in touch for a while, after which correspondence ceased. Her mails started bouncing back (email de-activated), her no became incorrect.

After 3 years of incommunicado. I get a facebook add last week from her. I was so happy. went on to check he rpage out. Girl friend is now so sexy and gorgeous. i mean all dose baby fat has disappeared, she is so slim now (maybe a size 2) and healthily so. Her stomach is as flat as a board, her complexion is glowing. without wasting time i begin to leave photo comments. (meanwhile i need to register at a gym o!)

After checking out a couple of pictures i realized she is a stripper / lap dancer / hostess in one club like that in DC. I mean d pictures were all but nude with tags like "me preparing for my lap dance", "me before the next set", "me with a customer before a private viewing", "my stunt double", "me and my dancing partner" (this dancing partner is a hunk of a man wearing thong), 'me and my pdancing pole", etc.

I was quite taken aback, cuz this is a buriful intelligent girl, from a wealthy family (am sure if i type her surname here everyone will go really, cuz her popc is well known) with the world at her finger tips and now this is what she has become. The curious me that i am i quickly did some research on the club she works for and got an article (interview) that she granted the press last year. In it she says she ran away from home cuz her popc was stifling her, Africa also stifles freedom of women and that she is very adventourous and innovative. so she bought a one way ticket to DC and never looked back, that her dad tried to get her but she wouldnt come back home, now she is free and living the life.

I guess i should be happy for her, she seems quite happy and fufillled but i turned and tossed that night, ( i tend to overburden myself with people's issue sometimes) wondering what the future will hold for her and stuff). am really toubled o! we used to be really really good friends at some point

But really for a buriful 21 yr old girl from a rich home to abandon studies and become a stripper. is it no big deal? i'd luv to hear especially for people in Diaspora. Maybe its just troubling me cuz i reside in Naija. am sure am over reactin abi?


mizchif said...

Hmmmmm, dis one, I don'y know what to say, cuz when i think of strippers, i just think you must really be desperate for cash for you to put urself on dat pole for lecherous men to come drool over.

On the other hand, maybe she has confidence issues, & needs all that ogling for her to feel good abt herself.

Rather sad tho, cuz strpping is a job with a very short time span. By the time gravity starts taking over, there's only so much the syrgeons knife can do.

Besides, there will also be younger girls.

And i've always tied stripping in with prostitution, & to me dat ish jus exposes you to all kinds of wierd BS!!

My dear, pls do not lose any sleep over the babe, maybe she's just living her dream.

Bombchell said...

hmm freedom comes at a price. i guess to her it wasn't worth being locked up and home and feeling like a prisoner.

here in the A there are a lot of strippers, infact people come from outta town for them, lol u can even tell from songs, but many of them use it to pay for college [shrugs]. life's a hustle i guess.

but dang in DC. i heard its either a classy joint or a hole in the wall.

the genius within said...

As long as she is happy, we can't begrudge her her decision..LOL

Anyways please send me her name to my inbox, i could check her out whenever i win my usa visa lottery..LOL

Thanks..Have a good week and take good care..

Mz. Dee said...

dang.....she needz prayers..datz all i can say...
cos i dont c any reason why she shud become a stripper..even if she wanted a freedom. if she wanted it so badly to leave her fam.. a stripper shudnt hv been the path to take. oh well... god help her.

Anonymous said...

to each his own, i always say.
i can't believe she granted an interview tho- that's kinda unfair to her family.

Mekistein said...

I guess ur friend had nutured this fantasy for a long time.Going to Yank was the perfect opportunity to live this dream...Good luck to her

LG said...

hmmm!! nawa o!! *shakes head*
abeg make i no talk pass dat one, only God kno sha,
i feel for her parents all d same.

*babes, dont worry ursef too much,
just remember her in ur prayers.

Anonymous said... speechless mehn...unlike mizchif I no fi say anything sensible....its a big deal mehn...a very very big deal...I think she mustav at some pt gotten a pause on her mautiry rate cuz no mature person will seek true fulfillment in a work stripping...this is really sad mehn...

Afrobabe said...

Lmao…Yeah, I think the same thing when I meet really pretty intelligent girls that seem to have lost the way..but sometimes I wonder if they are not happier..maybe we are the zombies that followed all the rules…

Uzezi said...

u r not over reacting. i particularly never like to judge girls, cos when u check their motive for doing the things they do, u might understand. like a girl selling herslef to feed her family or train her siblings and all. even if it isn't right and there can be other options, stuff happens right?

but like u said, she is from a rich home, so what is she there for? the freddom she so much craves? such freedom brings a lot of danger our way.

but who knows deep down why she is there doing that?

princesa said...

Each man to his own issues.
Na wa o...

It just doesn't make sense. What is it that she is craving ke?!!

Anyway, maybe she needs deliverance like a friend of mine would say.

It's so sad.

Parakeet said...

Ehm...lets break this down a bit more. What exactly is wrong with being a stripper and the likes? Why do we think being a say an office worker or a cleaner is better than being a stripper?

I remember a while ago I went to a gentleman's club with some friends but the place was split in two so they had the pole dancing section in one room and a club night in another room. One very stunning black girl entered the room who happened to be one of the strippers and I heard some guy call her name, like what? She's Nigerian. There was no bad name under the sun I didnt call her that night.

Two years on am more liberal. More accepting of people's vocation as long as they believe it does not undermine their integrity and it keeps the meal on the table. She earns money by bringing pleasure to men, I suppose we could call that her talent.

Although I would much more she was doing something that covers her modesty.

OluwaDee said...

Overreacting ke! @ all o.

Running away from home never works. Unless you are being molested, or abused.

She ran away from home, to become a stripper, n she claims to be living "the life". Yeah right!

Its just some 14th & Serenity sturves to me.

Aphrodite said...

@parakeet, i beg to disagree with u babes o!
This whole liberality thing get boundaries abeg.

Being a stripper will NEVER qualify in my books as a respectable profesion. She could have furthered her education and got a better job if she wanted to.

naijalines said...

Interesting post babes. Gets us thinking. Ok, I know we Nigerians are generally a conservative lot, lol. Like Parakeet, I've learnt not to judge...I think people find meaning to life in ways that makes sense to them. It does not mean we would be able to make sense of their quest for fulfilment.

I know people who would rather die than do a 9-5 office job. We all have different dreams and different paths to fulfil our dreams. We also make choices as to what paths we'd take to fulfil those dreams. She chose her path. It is not an easy path...All you can do is wish her well, hun.

doll said...

@all thanx 4d comment

archiwiz said...

Hmmm....I can't say this isn't baffling. Why did she feel that becoming a stripper was better/more freeing/ whatever than just doing anything else? And like mizchif said, stripping has a very short time span.

Its her choice sha. Hopefully she has a fall back plan for herself. Her parents and everybody else might fault her, but this is her way of doing her life the way she sees/knows fit.

pocketz♥full♥of♥posiez said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Standtall said...

Hmmm I feel you. But dont miss one fact that wealth,class and what have you dont define people all the time. What defines them is what they long to be.... She might be a stripper and a decent human being. As far as it goes, she might see that as just her career and handle everything professional.

Dont be bother too much. I have learnt to accept thigns like this

She will sure move into something else when she is ready

musco said...

'different strokes 4 different folks'.guess ur friend sees life as an adventure!

1st time here & i must confess i enjoyed reading all d posts on ur blog.

thanks 4 stopping by my blog!

Miss Definitely Maybe said...

Im with Parakeet on this one...each to his own
we shouldnt use our yardstick of what constitutes the moral or the immoral to measure someones (im)morality.
some people actually think 'when I grow up i wanna be a stripper' lol just the same way as we say when I grow up i want to be a doctor.
Dont think all strippers suffer from low self esteem or confidence issues maybe quite the opposite coz no amount of confidence in hell or heaven would get me up on a pole in my undies...hell to the no.
I guess every profession is a supply and demand vocation, as long as you, me and every one else is prepared to pay to watch semi naked men or women then there will always be men/women willing to do the full monty.
besides I think a lot of us do some kinda stripping in our everyday lives, this summer i've been walking about in my 'barely there ass huggers (shorts) difference is Im not getting paid for it lol

oroque said...

whatever makes you happy, is my thing. you've got only so long to live anyways...get your own stripper pole doll, and do the jigg. LOL