How important is luv?

in a marriage that is...

The bitter sweet emotion of loving someone and having that person luv you back is an emotion everybody should experience at least once in a lifetime..

I grew up reading all them romance book, believing in prince charming and happy ever after...
but these days, with the rate of divorce on the rise...i have to ask myself how important is luv...afterall these folks getting divorced didn't they luv each other at some point? when they said" I do" were they not in crazy luv?

So i have decided to re-define my "to look out for' in choosing a future partner..here is my top 8..

• Top on the list is religion...i want someone that has the same beliefs and faith as i do..infact i want at least one of his parents to have these beliefs and values

• Intelligence ..i want my children to be smart

• Financial stability - You have to earn more than me...i'v been in the opposite band wagon...the insecurities...God! JUST believe me....this does matter

• Romantic - them dinners, gifts, roses, chocolates, card...YES YES YES...bring them on
  

• Predictable - Am so done with spontaneity

• Organized- this is because i am highly disorganized

• Manly - No mushy mushy guy pls...i can cry a bucket for both of us when necessary
  

• Basket ball height < or = 6 feet - this used to be no 1..but now i guess it doesn't matter so much anymore...but please (God let him) be at least my height
  

where to draw the line

Growing up, my father made was very influential in a lot of decisions I made…like I wanted to go to arts class..he thought I was too bright to waste away like that so he instructed me to go to science class…now am working andfirm…writing my final diet of ICAN this year…
I was gonna move to a rented apartment cuz the commute from the mainland (ikeja) to the Island (VI) were I work was hellish my father raised the roof…no daughter of his was gonna live alone…what decent girl lives alone when he parents are alive and bla bla…so I decided to move in with my mum’s younger sis in Lekki phase one…my papa no gree…anyways I busted o!lived with the traffic and life moved on
After school, when job offers came to, my father steered me to making a decision on which to accept

And a lot of other decisions I can’t write about for lack of zeal and energy

Anyways this year I decided to buy a brand new car and my dad gave me HELL..literally…he was of the opinion that a 22 (was 22 then) years old, single girl had no business driving a brand new car, what will people say an so on…but I put my foot down…it was my own hard earned money no be say aristo wan buy am for me…so I went ahead and bought the car…the day the car landed my dad did not come down to see it…he just pretended like it did not exist…the succeeding month was hell so much
So that I was considering clearing my account to rent a flat…for I couldn’t do anything right in the sight of my father…and I knew everything was anger cuz of the car

Fast-forward six months to the present

My dad drives this car like its his own…sometimes without even telling me, he doesn’t hesitate to brag to his friends..“this is my daughter and this is her car”
And I wonder what If I dint go ahead..

This year also I changed my church from my parents Baptist church cuz I felt I wasn’t growing spiritually…hell was raised..but I put my foot down and I think am spiritually better for it today


So I attended a wedding last weekend…the bride and groom were my friend in school. They have been together for 6 over six years now…since year one in school..

They wanted to get married last year but the girl’s parents have always been opposed to the whole relationship and marriage cuz the bobo is muslim& from a polygamous home while she is Christian…she tried to persuade them and stuff..as they no gree..she ran away from home to the guys house…anyways she got pregnant that is when they finally agreed to let her marry him…;last weekend @the wedding ceremony she looked so heavy like she’s gonna give birth soon.
And I know when we were in school she was saving herself for marriage (as in no sex policy) an now she had to be wadlng up and down on her own wedding day..

That said they say what a child sees standing up, the elders see sitting down (literally meaning elders..parents…are wiser), the bible also said “obey your mother and father that your days may be long on earth….”
I know they had a valid point..marriage is hard enough you might as well go in with as much leveled ground as possible..but are some mistakes not the individual’s own to make..the most painful mistake is the mistake somebody else coerced you into making…your own mistake you can still live with.

Bn a while i posted

but iv been doing my blog rounds actively....things seem to be slow these days in blogville but not in my life.....


Got promoted at work
Passed my professional exams...am writing my finals soon
Doll (thats me) celebrated her blogversary
We (my family) moved houses...from the mainland to the island


my relationship....too much drama...all my own making of course.....i dont know what has come over me...


Quarter life crisis i blame you this confused state i find myself in

Why cant i make a decision and stick by it?

Anyways as per my other blog..haven't started posting...when i do it'l be public

Orgasm

Research conducted by Yours Truly, shows that holding urine back could lead to Urinary Tract Infection (UTI), weak bladder….and orgasm…Yes ORGASM…

About 5 years ago…or longer….I realized that when I hold back urine..i get orgasms…

Although at that point I had no idea that it was called an orgasm…it was just a pleasurable feeling that lasts for 10 seconds and shakes me a little at the end.

The orgasms are more “out of this world” if I help it with my thoughts….

I always thought I was weird until I stumbled on an article last week about women getting orgasms from holding back urine…out of curiosity I googled it up and saw that this is quite a common phenomenon…

But the fear of UTI and weak bladder has put the fear of God in me…maybe its just better to leave the orgasm generation to the men

But I swear..this urine induced orgasm is more powerful…

Totally Random

I’l be a year...23 to be precise this weekend...where are the May babies in the house???

Anyways was just reflecting on my life...i was promoted at work last week, the pay is gets better by the second, i bought a brand new car this year, am months away (by God’s grace) from being professionally chartered.

I seem to have achieved a lot for a girl my age but there is this nagging restlessness i cant shake off...this dissatisfaction, anxiousness ...am sorta on edge or is it bored... like waiting for what next..

Its just annoying cuz i cant place my hand on the cause..if its my job, my parents, my boyfriend, my car, my house ....LOL

Maybe its the numerous aso-ebi i keep buying, maybe its cuz my closest girlfriend just put to bed at 4am this morning...

Do i want to get married...NO..Not yet...i don’t want kids now...so what is my problem....why do i spend a lot of time these days thinking about marriage and kids and scaring the living shit out of myself...

My life is lacking excitement...

I need a new job so that i can get a life...

I guess am having quarter life crisis

Anyways make una join me thank papa God for an extra year and his never ending mercies...

If nothing else am sure he truly luvs me...

14th April 2004

It was a wednessday. We just returned to school from the Easter break. I had made up my mind during the holidays that I was ready to be yours…

We had dinner and I said yes…that we could be together…

Its hard to believe its 5 years…

Sometimes it seems like yesterday…

Sometimes it seems like a lifetime ago…

Sometimes am not sure anymore, sometimes the road seems too rough, sometimes love seems too hard, sometimes the issues seem endless, and sometimes the pain seems unbearable…

But…

I still Luv you

I still want you

I still see a future with you

Remembering today and always that my definition of luv is YOU

Happy anniversary baby

We are officially a break now

I asked for a break…. Our anniversary is in 2 weeks….14^th of April to be precise…

I need to sort my head out….do I still want this…..can I spend the rest of my life with him….

I need to pray…..maybe should fast….

I cant get over the heart-wrenching way he sounded on the phone…he seemed so broken…so….he just couldn’t understand what I need a break for…maybe cuz I couldn’t explain it as well….in his opinion things couldn’t be better….

But then a man that cannot give a girl a 2 week break from a straight non stop 5 year relationship…is he in luv with her or obsessed with her???

I hate being the cause of someone’s pain

I cant concentrate at work…

Its beginning to feel like cheating

There is this guy “E” – used to be my friend…well still is my friend..but we’v taken it a notch higher…we talk on phone like 4 times daily and the night conversations are quite long…

We see every weekend (not my fault tho..we take weekend classes at the same place..that is how we met)

I find myself looking forward to these chats

He is single

He is intelligent

He is matured

He is a good xtian

He is nice and caring

He doesn’t know I have a boyfriend

He is not asking me out

But he fancies me (I think)

I feel like am cheating but am not am I?

The four Meme

FOUR JOBS YOU'VE HAD IN YOUR LIFE
1. Unfortunately or should I say fortunately (am not sure which) am still at my first job - consultant


FOUR FICTIONAL JOBS YOU WISH YOU HAD
1. President of Nigeria.
2.Editor, Mills and Boons
3. Beyonce’s wardrope designer
4. MD Hilton worldwide



FOUR CITIES YOU'VE LIVED IN
1. Lagos
2. Kaduna
3.Osun
4. London

FOUR TV SHOWS YOU LOVE TO WATCH
1. One tree Hill
2. Prison Break
3. 24
4. Lost

FOUR PLACES YOU'VE BEEN ON VACATION/TRAVELED TO (I WISH)
1. London
2. Dubai
3. South Africa
4. America(I WISH)

FOUR WEBSITES YOU VISIT DAILY
1. Bloggs Ville
2.Google
3. Facebook
4. Yahoo

FOUR OF YOUR FAVORITE FOODS
1. Chicken
2. Pepper Soup
3.Rice
4. Chips

FOUR THINGS YOU WON'T EAT
1. Cereals of any kind
2. Swallow food of any kind
3. Un-cooked onions
4. Water melon

FOUR THINGS YOU WISH YOU COULD EAT OR DRINK RIGHT NOW
1. Chicken
2. Rice and dodo
3. Nkwobi
4. Diet coke

FOUR THINGS IN YOUR BEDROOM
1. Bed
2. Novels
3. Clothes
4. Shoes

FOUR THINGS YOU WISH YOU HAD IN YOUR BEDROOM
1. A carton of novels I haven’t read
2. A pile of series I haven’t washed
3. Book Shelves
4. More space.

FOUR THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW
1. A black (very sexy) bra
2. Matching thongs
3. Brown pants
4. Pink shirt

FOUR PLACES I'D RATHER BE RIGHT NOW
1. Dubai (shopping)
2. Paris (on vacation)
3. At home watching a series
4. In bed reading a novel


FOUR FICTIONAL PLACES I'D RATHER BE RIGHT NOW
1. In Wonderland with Alice.
2.In prison with Scofield
3. Lost on the magical island with Jack
4.White house with Obama


FOUR THINGS YOU ARE THINKING RIGHT NOW
1. Its Thursday almost a weekend
2. If only I dint have to go to classes this weekend I’d have gone clubbing tomorrrow
3. Am I making the most of my youth?
4. Damn! Haven’t read bible today

FOUR OF YOUR FAVORITE THINGS
1. Novels
2. Clothes
3. Cars
4. Shoes

FOUR THINGS YOU DON'T KNOW ABOUT ME
1. I cry when reading novel or watching films
2. I react to nickel in jewellery (hence I wear only Gold)
3. I am greatly discomforted when flying
4. I am afraid to sleep alone in a big house

FOUR PEOPLE YOU TAG
1. You
2. You
3.You
4. And You

Help

They say an elder does not learn to use left hand in his old age…yea whateva that means. I need help trying to stop some bad habits such as

Being scattered (My mum says no man would put up with this) – am not dirty (cant stand dirt) but am scattered. My wardrobe is upside down, even when I fold them stuff..i always upturn everything when am looking for what to wear

My room is disorganized, I have books, shoes, stuff generally…everywhere

Even my car booth is disorganized

Also I need help with nail biting – cant seem to beat this

Impatience – this is not even a habit….its a terrible vice

Being undecided – or should I say finding it hard to make decisions and sticking by them. Especially when it has to do with change